My story is not unique. Divorced parents, some depression, acting out and abusing my body with unhealthy habits. Mindless adolescent behaviors led to an absence of monthly periods that lasted from teenage years well into my 30’s. Possibly I have Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS), possibly I have hypothalamic amenorrhea (a term used when the pituitary shuts down and stops producing key hormones), or possibly I have a hybrid of both. Regardless of the official diagnosis, I was told I could not have a baby without drugs or help from the western medical system. So I gave up on the idea of wanting a child because I was stubborn and wanted to do it my way, without any outside assistance – medications, technology, etc. And I didn’t want to deal with the reality that things may not go according to MY plan.
In our youth we’re given many tools to help prevent a pregnancy. We’re told to practice safe sex until we’re mature enough to bring a new life into this world. We’re taught that procreation is an innate instruction embedded in our DNA, and that having a baby is only a choice NOT to make. Only when we make a conscious decision to start trying does it become apparent that things don’t always go according to plan.